A Guide to College Life: Those Students To Avoid

As a junior in college, I've realized that there are just some people that life would be better without. Or at least my life, if they suddenly were blown by some strong wind to Oz or Never Never Land, far from me.
I assume that I'm not the only one who has encountered such people. And so, here is a profile of those who you might want to avoid encounters with.

The Sleaze
At first, he seems harmless. He might be quiet, he might be charming. Perhaps, he acts like he has morals. He portrays the nice guy act as much as possible. And then, all of a sudden, he changes. He begins hitting on your best friend. Still, you think, "Hey....he's a nice guy. Maybe they'd be good together."
And then, you realize (through whine sessions and observing his prowling through younger girls like a shark through a school of fish) he is a self-absorbed, sleazebag who only wants in your friend's pants.
Note: he also might have groupies. Warn Freshmen girls about him. Warn your friends.

Mr. Sketch-tastic
Seems innocent. Might smile, but watch for the leer. He might start things out innocently enough by saying things like, "Wow. You're really smart. Could we study together?" or "Wanna be laundry buddies?" Be wary. Be very wary. Don't take invites, don't walk alone.

The Lounge Nazi
The title should be self-explanatory. This individual (most likely female) is a severe Type-A personality. They must have control, even of the TV that resides in your lounge. They most likely have a schedule taped to the television or table, informing everyone of the times the tv is not available to anyone else. Tread carefully in this area. As a type-A person, they're most likely to go running to security if you decide to mess with them by say, rewriting their schedule or hauling another TV out and watching something on it to interfere with their shows. Still, if taking cheap shots like so are ways of staying sane, by all means, Hawkeye and Trapper, continue.

The Emotional Drunk
It might be a roomate, it might be a friend. Who/whatever she/he is, you KNOW who I'm talking about. They're the one that cries when they've gotten wasted. They think everything is their fault, or maybe they begin to tell you how emotionally damaging it was that one Christmas when they didn't recieve Hungry Hungry Hippos from Santa.Whatever it may be, I can only suggest calming them, doing whatever it is you normally do with your drunks, and leaving. They'll only continue if you stay in the room.



And as this one has totally procrastinated enough this evening, she is signing off for now. (There may be possible additions to this issue over time).
Peace, Love and Pluto!